Last minute show with the Disastronots

Written on September 16th, 2011 by Edward

So it seems like, just when things begin to look up, some sorta shit has to hit the fan, and…ya know, splatter shit all over the place.

We’ve finally gotten this fucking website up and running, have shows booked, finished our EP, found a new bass player, etc. Good stuffs.

Then the other night (Sept 10 2011), we get a call last minute to play some sorta “radio feed” thing, at this tattoo parlor in Poplar Grove. Our Temp Bass player (Chris) had some friends in this band “The Disastronot’s” (look em up), and apparently all the other bands that were supposed to play had pulled out. So despite being semi-unprepared, we agreed to do it.

For all that don’t know (like most of you) I get horrible anxiety at various times…and having to get on stage, without time to mentally prepare for it, is one of the situations that always brings that on. So the whole four hours leading up to it (did I mention we only had 4 hours notice?), I was basically shitting my pants and wanting to vomit.

Anyway…We get there, are greeted by the guys in The Disastronots, who were all great and made it clear they appreciated us helping out. Then we see the “stage” and the PA.
Notice that “Stage” was in quotes? Thats because it barely qualified as a stage. It was basically a wooden deck, like the kind people have attached to the back of their houses. Probably 5′x12′, and literally 8 inches off the ground. Felt like we were playing on someone’s porch, or a family bbq or something. The PA, wasn’t terrible, but there was no stage monitors at all. So I basically couldn’t hear myself singing at all, and just had to hope for the best.

Anyways…From all the info we’d gotten, there was supposedly gonna be a “Live” radio feed of the show, some of our stuff played on this local rock station (WXRX 104.9 in Rockford), etc…Turns out the “live feed” was actually from the DJ chick, that was inside the tattoo shop, getting a tattoo.

As far as I know they didn’t broadcast either of the bands playing, live. Being as we were playing, I didn’t really get to listen myself. But from what I heard, they didn’t even mention it on the station. Which is rather lame. There was maybe 12 people there total, counting the guys in the Disastronot’s. It was ridiculous.

While I was setting up, some girl came up to me and asked if I wanted to get in on some “Raffle” where I could win “$100 of free tattoo”…I declined telling her “No thanks, I don’t want a tattoo.” She asked if I was sure, cause it’d be free. I told her “If I don’t want something, why would it being free make any difference?” She wandered off. Then some other lady came up, and told us “Don’t forget to go get her Autograph!” pointing at some chick standing by a car. So I asked “Why would I want her autograph?”

“Well She’s a Nascar driver!” she told me.
“Do I look like I watch Nascar?” I asked her.
“Well She’s famous. Way better than Danica Patrick” (whoever the fuck that is).
“Alright, well I still don’t care. Thanks though.” Then Continued setting up, and ignored her until she went away. I believe she was the owner of the Tattoo shoppe…but I dunno.

So there’s literally 12 people standing around watching this, counting the guys in the Disastronot’s. So we play most of our set. Then after about an hour we said fuck it, and just finished, so the D’Not’s could play.

At that point Chris and I wandered over to the hick bar next door. Some dude had two giant Great Danes out front, and a guy drove his motorcycle right up to the front door as we were walking in. The rest of the hicks out front were trashed and didn’t look to pleased that Chris and I were walking into their bar. Once we got inside, the only noise I could hear was AC/DC.
This place is right next door to the tattoo parlor, so you’d think the Band would have drown out their juke box…but apparently not. So I head to the bathroom, take a quick piss, and then get the fuck out of there…cause ya know. Fuck that shit.

I get back to the “stage” area, just in time to hear the Disastronot’s first song. In the middle of this, some asshole drunk old woman comes wandering over from the bar. Talking loud as shit, and calling the Drummer for the D’Nots “Darious Rucker” or “The Black Guy” alternating between the two. Then begins requesting that they Play some Hootie and the Blowfish song. Everyone (i.e. Us and the D’nots) all seemed to find this mildly amusing, and also slightly insulting. Cause, ya know, it was fucking insulting.

So a few minutes pass, and this chick starts rambling to Justin and I about how she’s from Texas, and a bunch of other random non-sense. Every couple minutes, she reminds us “Now don’t forget, I’m from TEXAS! So…(insert string of nonsensical bullshit here)” like we give a shit. Justin, being the polite guy he is…Just humors her, and acts all nice. I on the other hand, immediately began wondering why the fuck every asshole from Texas thinks, being from Texas is something to be proud of? I mean, not to say Texas is terrible or anything, I dunno, I’ve never been there. But really, if you think Texas is so fucking great…what the fuck are you doing in Poplar Grove IL?

Imagine if you went to Texas as started Proclaiming “I’m from Illinois!! I’m great” everyone would just think you were a loud mouthed asshole. But yet its ok for Texans to come here and act like we should be excited to ACTUALLY be meeting someone that is ACTUALLY from Texas.

So at some point I tried posing this question to her, but unfortunately she couldn’t hear what I was saying over the D’nots. Probably for the best. She then Began asking Justin, Chris (who was doing a great job of acting like she didn’t exist), and me “What do you think would be Sexier for a lower back tattoo? Should I get the word ‘Cow-Girl’? Or should I get ‘Texas’?”
“I don’t think lower back tattoo’s are Sexy. They’re called Tramp stamps for a reason.” I told her. She didn’t seem to find this amusing at all. So instead I suggested “Maybe you should just get a Big Bulls eye instead?” Again, didn’t find this funny at all.

It was around that time, that I wandered off to the side of the building to take a Phone call. Luckily my girl friend magically knew I needed a phone call to rescue me from having to converse with this woman any further. So I wandered off, and the Drunk lady resumed taunting the D’Nots drummer.

While I was on the side of the building, some dude with Triangular plugs in his ears walked up to me…Obviously seeing I was on the phone, and began speaking anyway. “Hey, next time their between songs, tell them they gotta stop. Someone called the cops, the county is shutting us down cause of the Noise ordinance.” How it became my job to give shitty news to the guys in the D’nots, I have no idea. But apparently Triangle ears thought it was best to make it my job. The Plugs in his ears made it clear, he was not capable of making good choices. His decision to make me do this, only reinforced this idea.

So after they finished their next song, I walked up to Jason (lead singer of the D’nots) an told him the news. His response to this was to place his mic directly infront of the PA, creating a HUGE wall of ear piercing feed back. Personally I thought this was a completely reasonable response. This squeal led to Triangle ears coming back outside, and once again explaining the situation. “Hey, Ya gotta shut it down, the cops have been called. The County shut us down due to the noise.”

At this point I have to say…Who ever set this fucking thing up, obviously doesn’t know dick about shit. First, there’s no real stage for the bands…Apparently they didn’t even bother booking reliable bands (besides the D’nots, and us who weren’t technically even booked to play, and just filled in)…The PA was the sorta thing you’d expect to see at a fucking karaoke bar…Judging by the turn out, they didn’t do any promotion…and Finally, they apparently didn’t even bother to try and get a fucking Permit. The D’Nots got to play literally 4 songs, before they got shut down.

So at that point, we all (EiLF and the D’nots) just sorta stood around talking loudly about what bullshit this all was. Justin went inside, and gave the DJ chick one of our CD’s, which I’m sure she promptly threw in the garbage, or simply forgot in the shop. We all packed our shit up, and went home.

The next morning I got on facebook to discover that apparently Cory (bassist, D’nots) took his own life later that night. I honestly don’t know any of the details of what happened, an if I did I wouldn’t discuss them here anyways. But yeah. I doubt the show had any impact on that, at least I hope it didn’t. I’d just met the guy that night, and he seemed like a great guy. I’m glad we got to see them play (even if it was just a few songs), before he died. But it also really pisses me off that his last show, had to be one that was so ill planned, and got shut down. Everyone deserves better than that.

— Edward

2 Responses to "Last minute show with the Disastronots"

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